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"Fasting for Ramadan"

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posted on | Mon, July 13th 2015

June 23,2015. I am on my sixth day of fasting during the month of Ramadan.
I am enjoying my fast and I am loving the increased forms of worshiping
Allah. We are being allowed to go over to the Chapel (Masjid) every evening
at 6:3U pm until 7:45 pm and we are reading Quran and helping others learn
to memorize the prayers in Arabic. Its only a few of us since the other
side of the yard (lower yard) has been on locked down. You see, at this prison
they have buildings 1,2,3 and 4 on the lower yard. Building 5 and 6 are
medical (mental Health) buildings. They don’t program with no one else. Then
buildings 7 and 8 are the upper yard. Now the Blacks on the upper yard
can program with the inmates on the lower yard but the Mexicans (Bulldogs)
on the upper yard can not be around the Mexicans(Northern & Southern) on
the lower yard. They have been having a war between them for years and
if they get to each other they get into it. The only place off limits is
the visiting room. There’s an unwritten rule that the visiting room is off
limits during all wars.
So, I nave been fasting and reading the Quran and studying a lot more during
the month of Ramadan. I have not had any coffee in six days and I’ve been
sleeping a lot better. I get up at 3:15 am and eat and drink my water and
then perform my morning prayer (Fajr) and then begin my fast until 8:27
pm when Magrib prayer comes in. I am looking forward to loosing some weight
during this month too. They give us a meal in the evening and its really
bad the way they are treating us with the food. I am the person who is
passing the food out to the Muslims every evening and its bad. But, I am
not going to let that mess with my fast. I have food in my cell so I am
not worried about it.
I’ve been seeing the news about the murders of the people in church in
South Carolina. Its a shame that someone would got in the church and kill
those people during worship. Its a damn shame that that Sate continues
to hold on to the things that symbolize Slavery and white supremacy. You
have that Kind of environment and then people wonder why people do the
things that they do? Now, they want to address the Confederate Flag flying
over their State Capitol. There’s a lot of things they need to address
like the statue of John Calhoun who was a very strong defender of slavery

that’s not far where these murders occurred. That whole state is full of statues

and symbols that remind people of the views of South Carolina’s
support and battles for slavery. I went boot camp in South Carolina and
I remember seeing all kinds of things in that State. Now they want to
ask way this twenty one year old kid could have the views he have towards
Black people.
Did you all notice he actually had some black friends? Yeah, I saw two
black young men speak about him being there friend and not seeing these
things in aim. Yeah, I see a lot of that that snows people be hating people
and giving off a complete different view. I am telling you a lot of people
who people think is good people don’t like Black people period !! Its
like they have been saying. Its in the DNA of this country. Its a shame
that this country don’t realize the dept it owes to the Black people.
Yet, they continue to oppress us in one form or another with there we
are all equal bullshit !
You know what really bottlers me and a lot of you wont like what I am going
to say. The way we Black people are damn quick to forgive !! Before they
catch him we are already forgiving him. When have we been forgiven for
anything? They continue to ling ways to keep us oppressed. Just look at
the unemployment rate for Blacks which is at 10% right now. I remember
when it was nationally 84 people was ready to crucify the president for
such a high unemployment rate. But, with the African American rate at
104 the economy is doing good. I don’t even like using the word African
American any more because to be American is to be European (White) and
its impossible to be African European !
I am not speaking as a person who don’t like Waite people. Its against
my beliefs and my heart to hate any group of people because of there race
but I’ll be a damn fool not to call it what it is ! This country was made
on the blood of Black slaves and every since then the Black man has not
been given his share of the proceeds that his blood earned. He was taught
an education that continues to limit him. He_was given a religion that promote
Obeying your Master and turn the other cheek and love your enemies and all
the other things that is against human nature. I see more from this cell
that most people see and its a shame. We are already forgiving them before
they are held accountable ! Why in the hell will they change if they are the

beneficiaries of the conditions if they are allowed to continue to
do the things that they have benefited from ? We really expect society
to all a sudden change to benefit all people. Some of us expect them to
give Black people and stand up. Its not going to happen ! Everything that’s
happened has happened before and it has stayed the way it is. Do you realize
that not so long ago a Police shot a Black man in the back several times
and then was caught putting his taser by his body as well as the other
Police reports reflect something totally different then what happened.
Yes, he was indicted for murder but if this was not caught on tape what
do you think would have happened ? This incident happened in Charleston
South Carolina too. They are not lieing when they say racism is in the
DNA of this country.
I hope you all got to see the DNA chain of custody forms and the transcripts
I posted on the Massachusetts case. Please go check them out and see for
yourself what happened. It really upsets me when I sit back and think
of now I was taken to a place I have never been and given a case. This
whole system can kiss my kiss my you know what !! I can’t say what I really
want to say because I’m fasting and I am not trying to let the anger nave
such a place in me. When I think of these things I don’t sleep right and
I become so irritated and frustrated that it really affects me. I just
can’t see this thing holding up but, I’ve been in prison for over twenty
four years for a crime I did not do so what the hell do I know ?
I sent several letters to Lawyers about filing a suit for Libel on the
Publishers and the Author of that book. I’m waiting for someone to get
back at me. I’m going to send out several other ones when I get some more
addresses to local Lawyers. I just need someone to come see me so I can
explain everything to them because the case is very strong. The law says
defense against Libel is the truth and they lied so that’s not a defense.
I just nave to meet the time restraints and I think they apply only when
I’m aware of the published materials. These things been out since 2002
but I just learned of them in 20013. That book is still out their so it
is still affecting me. I just hope one of these Lawyer contact me.

June 24,2015. I just spoke to my Mom on the phone and I am so blessed
to nave her as my Mom. I truly feel I don’t care about the things that
can go wrong in these places as long as she is alright I am all right.
You know, if it was not for her I don’t think I could be as peaceful a
person as I am. What I mean is I remember when they convicted me of the
murders here in California. I really thought about giving these people
two murders so I’ll be in here for something I did. I remember this very
clear. It was in 1998 and I was at Corcoran State prison. I was going
around contemplating who I was going to kill. I remember when I spoke
to my Mom on the phone and she told me not to let this change who I am.
She went on to talk about faith and never giving up and she told me she
was proud of me. I couldn’t do it !! She has been my rock!
I understand that sounds crazy here I was going around with those thoughts
with a knife on me. But you would not know what it is to be told you are
going to be in prison for the rest of your life for a crime you did not
do. Not only that but the crime itself was something I am not capable
of doing ! I love my Mom and when I speak to her its like everything is
going to be okay because she is okay !! I learned she will always be there
for me. My wife took off on me and other too but Mom has always been there
for me and sties my number one girl ! Mats what I always tell her. Smile !
I an listening to this CD called old school slow jams. I don’t usually
listen to music during Ramadan but this music is good for the soul. It
is not anything negative or anything that could affect my fast. My sister
just told me she would buy me some CD’s for my next package. You see,
we are allowed to get a thirty pound package every three months from vendors
that the prison allows us to use. My sister always look out for me i
I need something. I_nave some money out their but her and my Mom always
make sure I get what I need. I always tell them to use the money I nave
but they do what they want which is pay for it themselves. Its cool because
I know I appreciate it and don’t take then for granted. My little money
is running out anyway. I’m blessed to have them and I thank them and God
for them daily.
My fast is going real good. I ate two Apples and a Peanut butter and Jelly
sandwiches and drank five cups of water for my morning Sahor meal at

3:30am and I am feeling good. I did a sit up routine and a leg routine
today and I feel stronger than I’ve been feeling during my fast. You know
I truly realize now I don’t need all the food I’ve been use to eating.
I’m going to make even further changes in my eating habits. This year
I really stopped eating a lot of junk food. I’ve been eating alot of sea
foods and soups. I’m now cutting down on eating breads and red meats. I
am truly going to be more aware of everything that go’s into my body.
I just know I can feel better then I have been feeling. I know I am not
the young person I was before I went to the SHU but I can’t except the
fact that running and other exercises are so much harder then they was
in 2008. I’m going to get mines back !! Its just going to take a lot of
work.
June 25,2015. Today I heard about the Boston Marathon Bomber being sentenced
to Death. Now let me state that I know without a doubt that what he did
was wrong and not justified in any manner Islamically ! But, I heard him
apologize to the victims knowing that his apology will not spare him
the death penalty because its mandatory that the Judge sentenced him to
death under Federal law once the Jury give you the death penalty. But he
also affected his Appeal do to him admitting that he was guilty during
his apology. I heard now he said he heard the victims and he was sorry
and how he caused the pain and so on. Then I heard the victims respond
and I heard one person except his apology. The rest of them did not care
about his apology and one of them even said she did not want to hear any
of that Allah stuff. They cut her off before she could elaborate any further.
Now I am not saying they should except his apology. What I am saying is
he apologized with nothing to gain in this world but everything to loose.
Yet, when this kid go’s in and killed those people praying in South Carolina
they was forgiving him before the bodies was cold. Why is Black people so
forgiven ? Over two hundred years of slavery, ninety years of Jim Crow and
thirty years of red lining and we are still apologizing.
My mom is a Christian as well as my brothers and sister. I love them but
I know without a doubt that Christianity was given to us as Slaves to keep
us oppressed. It teaches to obey your master, turn the other cheek, Love
thy enemy and other things that go’s against human nature. This religion

which is no longer being taught in its correct form due to the alterations
of the Bible has hampered us as a whole. They nave preachers who claim
to be Gods teachers telling their congregation that they need millions
if dollars to buy a new jet, and once he’s called on this gets up their
and try to justify it. Don’t take me wrong the Bible is Gods book but
it has been altered from its original form. Its so much a part of the Black
people that its a food on out throat, keeping us down!
Ask the Jews when are they going to start forgiving ? They will look at
you like your crazy ! They have prosecuted people over ninety years old
for being a part of the Nazis and they ain’t forgiving nobody ! Wily in the
nail do we always forgive ? Yeah,racism is in the DNA of this country and
we as Black people are still suffering from the psychosis of that slavery.
You know its a shame when I speak about the reality of whats going on in
this world I even feel like I am a racist for speaking the truth. That’s
why the Black people who are aware of the conditions and the reasons for
these conditions are so hesitant to speak out on the truth. They are trying
to be politically correct instead of getting to the truth of the matter.
The thing is if we are not willing to get to the truth of it then who is
going to ?
They made a issue about the president saying “nigger” in his weekly address
on the radio. You know, I don’t use that word period. But the context he
used it in was correct. I strongly feel he has been putting a lot of attention
into not looking like the angry Black man that so many in society think
we are, that he has been very reserve when it comes to race. I remember
the first time he spoke out about the police arresting the professor name
Gates they (white,people) ate him up for that. Now that he is at the end
of his presidency he is addressing a lot of issues he would not touch before.
I heard the first lady speak to a graduating class at a Black University
and I was so proud of her to keep it real. She is very sharp and I wish
we could hear her speak more.
Well I am going to end this so I can send it out to be posted. I hope some
of you take the time to tell me what you think of what I am saying. You
can e-mail me and they will be forwarded to me. I hope you all can assist
me in anyway you feel I need it. Once I get more of the transcripts posted

I am going to contact several organizations and nave the go to the site
so they can see the evidence of my innocents. If any of you have any ideas
please let me know. I’m really trying my best to get this out their so
people can see for themselves. Well, you all take it easy and may Allah
(God) grant you success in all your good actions.
7.

Please share your thoughts with me.

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